Bullyproof

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of 2009, wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experiences.
I will dispense this advice now:

Enjoy the power and the beauty of your youth.
Oh, never mind. You'll never understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back and photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you looked. You are not as fat as you imagined.

Don't worry about the future, or worry. But know that worrying is as effective as solving an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are actually the things that never crossed your worried mind, the ones that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other peoples hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste time on jealousy.

Sometimes you're ahead. Sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your hold love letters and throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with the rest of their lives. some of the most interesting 40 year olds still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40. Maybe you'll dance to funky chicken and your 75th wedding anniversary.

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either.

Your choices are half chance, and so are everybody elses.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it. It's the best instrument you'll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have no-where to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worse.

But trust me on the sunscreen.